CACINA

Where is God when I need him most?

Posted in Uncategorized by frvictorray on April 25, 2020

When I learned my dear friend was killed in a car accident this summer, I was stunned. She was my second mom, and a faithful wife, mother, and friend. She was unforgettable. And her life was snapped so abruptly that I couldn’t process it.

Immediately I turned to the Lord. In this sick confusion, this shocking storm of fear, this sudden disruption of a beautiful existence, I cried out to him.

And I heard nothing. Absolute silence.

This unsettling sense of abandonment appeared to contradict Psalm 46:1, “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.” Why was it that when I most needed his presence he seemed most agonizingly absent?

As C.S. Lewis so bluntly asked in the midst of his own grief, “Why is he so present a commander in our time of prosperity and so very absent a help in time of trouble?”

God was totally sovereign over the scene. This truth felt more painful than comforting in the aftermath. Mere seconds or inches, and she could have been spared. Her end was not random. It was at least allowed, if not orchestrated, and this terrified me. God, who I trusted, wrote this suffering into our story.

So, when you’re tempted to distrust what feels like an absent God, what do you do?

Check back on this post tomorrow for more? CACINA Catholics are affirming and welcoming Jurisdiction, find us at: WWW.CACINA.ORG

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